If Paul had been a Celebrity

My post several days ago, on Christian Celebrities, was terrible.  If I had to review it, I would be harsh; maybe even this harsh.  Good idea, but made of fail.  Really, I had nothing to say but felt obligated to post since I said I would.  I should have just said that. 

Anyway, something interesting may yet come of it, thanks entirely to Roger and his comment/question.  He asked if Paul was/is a celebrity.  I said no; you can read my brief answer in the comments.  But it gave me an idea.  

What if he had been?  I think things would have been different, so here are some of my thoughts on this 'what if'. 

1. Who is the Jerusalem Kid? - News coming out of the middle east reports a new pair of rising stars: Paul and Barnabas.  Paul is taking most of the limelight as the pair travel around preaching a message of hope and good news and establishing something they call 'churches' which appear to be new kinds of temples they use as bases for their show.  

2. Barnabas Did What? - Yes folks, you heard it here first.  Barnabas has officially made the unwise career move of separating with Paul.  I mean sure, celebrities are not easy to get along with, but how could Barnabas expect anything but to completely drop from the scene?  Yet another would be star washed up because he wanted to 'move along' and 'try new things.' He had such promise.  Meanwhile, the Jerusalem Kid, increasingly known as 'The Apostle' marches onward in fame.  

3. Jerusalem Kid Expanding - Despite losing half his act, the star of Paul continues to rise.  He now has shows, or 'churches,' going on in Galatia and several in the area of Macedonia.  He is reportedly heading to Corinth next.  What can't this man do?

4. Corinth: Paul's Biggest Fans - When Paul finally got around to visiting Corinth he fit right in.  Corinth has always been into the next big thing and those 'super apostles' have got nothing on that most spectacular Apostle of all.  Indeed, the honor and pride of Corinth swelled this week as Paul helped them out in the midst of their famine, answered all their most pressing questions, and encouraged them to support him in his ministry.  Nothing like becoming patrons to the next big star!

5. Who will be Paul's publisher? - Paul's meteoric rise as a celebrity has been hard to follow.  Paul recently received an offer to include some of his letters in a new publication which will be called "The New Testament."  It looks to be a prestigious offer, put together by God Himself, but many think it would be best for him to publish independently.  Personally, we are holding our breath to see which way he goes. 

6. Acts of Paul - What kind of celebrity shares a biography? No, the 'Acts of the Apostles' which so many enjoyed was merely a prologue for 'The Acts of Paul'.  This two volume work features extended explanations of the life of that most famous of all apostles, Saul who became Paul.  New features include interviews with those who knew him, excerpts from his childhood diaries, and full copies of his speeches. 

7. Get a Platform Paul! - Paul's popularity has catapulted his teachings onto the world stage where they are, inevitably, being examined by some of the best.  In this setting Paul has become the target of some severe criticism for not having a clear enough platform.  Some have pointed out that he seems to be all over the place in his letters and much more concerned with local problems than his public image. We know you stand for the gospel Paul, but we need more!

8. World Rocked by the Apostle's Hidden Sin - No, we don't know what he did. No one does. In some of his correspondence, which reporters recently uncovered, Paul has mentioned a thorn that the Lord has not allowed him to overcome. What could it be? We can only speculate, but it must be something pretty awful for Paul to refuse to comment further. 

9. Paul on Drugs? - Paul's recent talk of visions and voices has some people wondering if he has been sniffing the fumes in some foreign temples... the increasing number of questions regarding the Apostle's integrity have some wondering how long we have to wait until he falls irreparably and becomes the next in a long list of failed celebrities.  

10. The Letter from the Romans - Word has it Paul was preparing a letter to Rome, but now he will never have to finish it.  They have sent for him! Romans is a letter to Paul from the Romans inviting this 'hot new star' to come and 'perform in the big city.' 

11.  The End of a Stunning Career - Ups and downs around the world, we have been following the rise of Paul for some time.  Sadly, this story has come to an end at the hands of the Roman authorities.  Rome has always been a hard act, and Paul is hardly the first one to end just a head short of victory.  Paul's fans around the middle east and asia minor join in mourning this day.  

12. The Complete Works of Paul - Ever wondered about those missing letters?  Wanted to read the rest of the Corinthian correspondence? See Paul's own words about the hidden sin that shook his world? Well, now you can!  Paul may have passed on, but thanks to dedicated fans of the amazing apostle, people who collected everything he ever touched, we now have not only everything he ever wrote but most of what he said on record! 

13. Paul: A Man of the Ages - Yes, you too can own your very own complete set of the statues of Paul.  Modeled at all the ages of his life, this set of six statues contain incredible detail.  It has always been surprising that Paul overcame his physical appearance to become so popular, but by the end of his life it was one of his distinguishing marks.  


Lloyd said...

Amen. I really enjoyed reading the posts on your blog. I would like to invite you to come on over to my blog and check it out. God bless, Lloyd

Anonymous said...

Very good. Thank you.

You missed "The Apostle Formerly Known as Saul".

Roger Hui