20 Years, 40 Books: Reflecting on Words that have Shaped Me

As far back as I can remember books have been an important part of my life.

My wife would be quick to tell you that this isn't as far back as you might think. My memories of life before the age of 13 are episodic at best. But, alongside of family and the outdoors, those episodes regularly feature books. 

Some of the first books I sought out, rather than having on hand, were Calvin and Hobbes and Choose Your Own Adventure books. I wanted to make my own choices but not miss anything. So I made bookmarks (pieces of paper with numbers on them), marked each choice and, after reaching an end, backed up and choose again until I had read every possibility.

Thanks to my father I transitioned into science fiction. He passed on to me the works of Isaac Asimov, Arthur C. Clarke, Frank Herbert, and Robert Heinlein. You can't read just one of those and then stop. This is just one of the many ways I have been blessed by my father. 

When I was a young teenager I joined my first book club (with a friend; thank you Florin!).

We signed up by mail and received bi-monthly printed catalogs. We eagerly anticipated each new booklet with all of its bookish surprises. Each order brought with it a small sense of victory as we refused the 'feature' books, which were always full price, and bought the bargain books, which could be had as low as $2 a book. This usually required us to order a dozen books, but we weren't complaining! 

What we did complain about was the waiting. You haven't had your patience tried until you've had to wait for your order to crawl back to the distributor and their books to crawl back to you at the pace of mid-90's non-rushed postal services!  

Highlights from those years include the first 8 volumes of The Wheel of Time, the original four Sword of Truth books, as well as a smattering of authors such as Terry Pratchett, Michael Crichton, and Orson Scott Card. 

As a teenager I liked reading fiction, loathed most of the reading I was assigned in English classes, and thought about reading as one of the best form of entertainment available. I did not, however, think about reading as formative. Of course it was. Anything you gift with that kind of sustained attention will inevitably be formative. I simply wasn't conscious of it. 

That all changed late in high-school. I had yet to pick up a piece of non-fiction out of my own desire when a friend recommended, and lent, two books to me: The Jesus I Never Knew, by Philip Yancey, and The Screwtape Letters, by C.S. Lewis. Unbeknownst to my friend he sent me down a road on which books have exercised a disproportionately large formative influence over me. I still walk this road today. 

I'm going to leave you hanging there for now and fast forward to the present. I still devour books, fiction and non-fiction alike. I am no longer part of a book club (do they still exist?) but over the past five years I have started to plan out a portion of my reading for each year.

Five years ago I read many of the works of G.K. Chesterton. Four years ago I read The Ironies of Faith by Anhtony Esolen and, alongside of it, every book he explores (glance at the full title and table of contents to see what I mean). Three years ago I focused on Helmut Thielicke (sadly, there were a few of his books I couldn't get in English). Two years ago I read one biography a month, biographies being a genre I had spent very little time in. Last year I read most of Anthony Thiselton's books, skipping his compendiums. 

I have thoroughly enjoyed this. Without intending to I have alternated between focusing on a single author and focusing on some kind of theme. As I approached 2020, and this fact became clear, I searched for a theme to guide a portion of my reading. 

The idea of rereading books that have particularly impacted me stuck, and I started pulling books off of my shelves. By the time I was done I had way too many books on the floor and I was far short of the reading plan I had imagined. I needed to be more specific. As I sat on the floor, surrounded by the fruit of brilliant people through the ages, wrestling with the fact that I was going to have to start making cuts, I organized the books by the order in which I had read them. There is nothing like a completely unnecessary secondary task to facilitate avoiding a distasteful primary task!

I organized and reminisced and wiled away the better part of an hour before I reached the end and was struck by the fact that I had found my system. I would select a few books from each stage of my life and reread them in that order. 

Who am I kidding though. A few? I never did find a good way to make cuts. Looking at the 'earliest' book on the pile, the aforementioned Screwtape Letters, and thinking about reading that as a 17 year old, it occurred to me that I was surrounded by 20 years of reading. 20 years, 2 a year, 40 books. Done. The pile is bigger than any other years reading plan so far (Helmut Thielicke comes in second place at 29 books) but I did feel much better having providing a rational for my inability to make cuts. Even now, I'm wrestling with the last few. My pile is currently fluctuating between 42 and 45 books. 

Now, if you've read this far, thank you. You may be wondering why I am writing all of this. Let me tell you. 

I am, currently, reading my fourth book in this reading plan (Yes, I'm behind. I had a late start by the time I got the plan ironed out) and I haven't been able to shake the desire to write about them as well. I want to spend time reflecting on each book, why and how it impacted me when I first read it, and my story around that book. 

I've only ever had one place where I write about and reflect on books: This blog. Thus it is that you find me dusting it off after over five years of silence.

I'm hoping to write about each of these 40 books. We'll see what happens. If blogging has taught me anything it is that neither I nor reality often spring as high as my hopes, which are themselves not as resilient as I might, well, hope. 

I will not be writing book reviews in the format I've used before. The fact that these books have made it into this reading plan already tells you I think they are pretty good. Instead, as I post about each book I will summarize it and focus on the areas of reflection mentioned above. 

As for you, well, you are welcome to come along for any part of the ride you want to! Know that if you do you are going to get one part book introduction/review, one part thoughtful reflection on said book as I have been shaped by it, and one part my story, as told through books.